We open this week's edition of Raw with one of the most beautiful sights of all time...
The friggin' Lex Express!
Since Yokozuna is still denying Luger a title shot, and since the body slam on the U.S.S Intrepid wasn't enough apparently to warrant him one, Lex Luger's big idea to earn a title shot at Summerslam is to sit on a bus for a couple weeks and go from state to state earning the support of the wrestling fans. Stay tuned as in a couple weeks time we'll be given the pleasure of one of the corniest and greatest music videos of all time.
Opening in ring action on Raw this week is the WWF Intercontinental Championship. It's another chapter in the history of the Rockers feud as champion Shawn Michaels and Marty Janetty. Prior to the match, we're recapped of Marty's victory nine weeks prior with the help of Mr. Perfect and his magic towel. Marty gets a pretty good pop from the Manhattan Center crowd.
Shawn starts the match with a cheap shot to Janetty and lays in some elbows. Back body drop is countered by Marty, who then tries a back slide, but Shawn counters, however Marty is fast enough to hit a clothesline. Roll up by Marty for two. Powerslam attempt by Marty is countered by Michaels, but Marty manages to toss him over the top rope. Shawn gets back in and locks in a headlock. Marty breaks out and leapfrogs a couple times. He tries a hiptoss which Shawn counters with a thumb to the eye. Clotheslines and superkicks both ducked by Marty as we're still in an intense stalemate.
Shawn gets a cheap shot in the corner but misses a splash, which Marty manages a hip toss and a slam for a two count. Marty then locks in an arm bar, while Bobby Heenan makes a Spiro Agnew reference. Elbow by Shawn to break. He tries another attack in the corner, but Marty counters and manages an elbow off the top turnbuckle. He goes up again, but Shawn gets up. Marty was prepared for it, and lands a DDT. Cover gets the three, but since Shawn had his foot on the rope, the pinfall doesn't count and the match continues.
Marty and Shawn are brawling outside as we return from commercial break. Marty throws Shawn back in and goes for an Irish whip, and hits a vertical suplex for a two. This is followed with a backbreaker for another two count. Sleeper hold is locked in by Marty Janetty, which Shawn turns into a back suplex. Big elbow to the jaw of Marty, who is then knocked out of the ring. When they get back in the ring, both men collide into each other, and Shawn ends up falling through the ring. Diesel picks him up and tries to help him in as we go to break again.
Back in the ring, Shawn hits an axe handle off the top rope for a two count. Headlock on Marty, who manages to break it after about a minue, but Shawn gets a knee to the gut to keep him downed and. Front facelock applied by Shawn who used the ropes to add leverage. Hebner does the arm drop spot, and as always, Marty recovers on the third drop. He lifts Shawn and drops him groin first on the top rope. Hard rights followed by a jumping elbow for a two count. Back body drop turned into a powerbomb, turned into a hurricanrana by Marty for a close two. Shawn dodges a splash in the corner, and hits a cross body off the top, countered by Marty for a two. Rocker dropper by Marty, as Shawn gets himself caught in the rope. Marty tries a cross body, but Shawn ducks, causing him to crash and burn outside. Dieself tosses Marty back in, and Shawn gets the three.
What an amazing match. Easily the best of the former Rockers encounters that we've seen on this blog. It was given a lot of time, both men looked strong throughout. Lots of drama and near falls, and an ending that makes sense with Marty making one too many high risk choices. Marty Janetty for all his faults is a criminally underrated worker. Yes, he wasn't the star that Shawn became, and mostly due to his own actions, but he could work, and could deliver on some exciting ring action, especially for this point in the company's history.
Vince is in the ring to interview Money Inc. IRS reminds us as always that we're all tax cheats, and that they were robbed of the tag titles by the Steiners. Next week on Raw, they're going to get their rematch for the tag team titles. The next thing Dibiase brings up is Razor Ramon, who hasn't had a good couple months as we've seen. Razor isn't happy with the comments by Dibiase, and heads to the ring.
Dibiase and IRS say that they could offer a loser like Ramon any menial labor job they require. Razor declines the offer. He's done a lot of work with his hands, but he's done it for him. Dibiase doubts that Razor doesn't have a price, and slaps him with his money. Racor fights back, sending both of the former tag champs out of the ring. And with that, the Razor Ramon face turn is complete, and I'm personally elated to see it. In the ring, Dibiase promises that he'll embarrass Razor by showing how easy it is to beat the 1-2-3 Kid.
Up next is the Raw debut of MOM: Men on a Mission, who get a good reaction as Mo, Mabel, and Oscar enter the ring. They throw Hank Harris out of the ring. Mo hits a drop toe hold and Mabel follows up with a massive leg drop on Rich Meyers. Big body slam by Mabel, followed by double elbows by both members of M.O.M. Tag to Harris, who gets hit with clubbing blows by Mabel and a shoulder block. Another body slam by Mabel, followed by a splash by both members for a three. Still not feeling this tag team, but honestly that was a fairly decent debut.
Mean Gene's dancing up a storm as we get our weekly Summerslam report. The card at the moment features Jerry Lawler against Bret Hart, and a "Rest in Peace" match between the Undertaker and Mr. Hugh... oh wait, against Giant Gonzalez. Because of all the Wrestlemania rematches I needed to be privy to, the one I clearly wanted was that stinker again. Also, wouldn't it make more sense to have it be Taker and Hughes since Mr. Hughes has been carrying the urn around.
We get a video package of Lex Luger in the Lex Express travelling across the country as Luger signs the casts of injured kids, asks people for support, and caps it off in true patriotic cheese by flexing on top of the bus, in front of the Washington monument.
Bastion Booger is in action next against Scott Despres. Booger's singlet looking all the more stained and dirty. Big sitting drop on the back of Despre, followed by a leg drop. Body slam and a sitting splash on Despres for a quick three.
Up next it's the King's Court with Jerry "the King" Lawler. As he crowd annoys him with "Burger King" chants. Lawler mentions that he can't wait to see Bam Bam Bigelow defeat Bret Hart later on, despite it being booked for next week's Raw. Kinda revealing that these shows are taped two at a time there, King. His guest this week is famed musician Tiny Tim, complete with Mickey Mouse jsuit and his beloved ukulele. Lawler mocks his look, and asks him to sing "Tiptoe Through the Tulips", while quickly stopping him.
TIny Tim shills his radio show as the crowd begins to loudly chant "We Want Bret". Lawler asks if Tim thinks he's a burger king. Tim thinks instead that he's a dairy queen, as the crowd chants along. Lawler in frustration smashes Tiny Tim's ukulele, as Tiny Tim has the worst crying fit of all time to end one of the strangest things I've ever seen on this show.
It's our last match of the night as the 1-2-3 Kid takes on Chris Duffy. Quick trip and cover by the Kid only gets a two. Money Inc are on the entrance way as we learn that the Kid has accepted the challenge of the Million Dollar Man. Meanwhile Razor shows up on the other side. In the ring, The kid hits two leg drops. Boot by Meyers out of the corner, who hits a shoulder block. But the kid gets a spin kick and a clothesline. Dropkick in the corner, and a leg drop off the top for the three. He goes through the crowd to avoid both Razor and Money Inc.Razor and Dibiase try to brawl with each other as they go to break.
Next week on Raw, it will be Bret Hart vs Bam Bam Bigelow. Bret will bring his parents Stu and Helen with him. I'm sure that won't entice Jerry Lawler in any way.
This was a fun Raw. An amazing title match between Shawn and Marty to start things strong, a full on face turn for Razor Ramon, and the debut we've all been waiting for... the Lex Express has finally arrived! Oh, and Men on a Mission were okay too I guess. I also enjoyed the King's Court with Tiny Tim as it was absurd but entertaining. Only downside is a nothing Bastion Booger match, and a quick 1-2-3 Kid match, but neither were bad enough to ruin an enjoyable A- edition of Monday Night Raw.